i'm in!

so I made the boat.  It feels pretty good, like a giant boa constrictor off my shoulders.  No more battle-paddle, no more seat-racing, no more paranoia.  The downside was that it was awkward to say goodbye to the guys who got cut.  I have become friends with a number of them, and I will miss bar-b-q ing and drinking beer with them.  There was a whole series of unfortunate conversations where people would say congratulations, and then I would say I'm sorry they didnt make it, and then they would launch into a speech about how frustrating it was, and how it wasn't fair that they got cut.  Its not fair most of the time.  There is no such thing as a fair seatrace; conditions, lineups, and fatigue all create variables which are not constant for every piece.  Hence, there is really nothing to say to the guys who got cut except "sorry".  Particularly rough was saying goodbye to Glenn, who I really like, but also knocked out of the boat, and who I believe deserved another seatrace against someone else in the boat.  For him it was the first time he had lost a seatrace or failed to make "the boat", including several U23 and junior national team camps.  Despite this downer, things move on.

The attitude of the boat this year feels really different from last year.  The egos are smaller (albeit large enough), allowing for people to adjust their strokes and row more synchronously.  There also seems more of a focus on winning Worlds.  Last year, there was a desire to win and succeed at worlds, but there was also a sense that just making the boat was accomplishment enough.  This year, I feel that if we don't win, it will be more than disappointment; it will feel like failure.  We will test out our speed on friday with a time trial.  After that, on Tuesday, we will head down to Princeton, where we will really test our speed against the Olympic boat.

We had two workouts today, both of them skill and drill, both which made me feel better about our lineup, but worse about my own rowing.  I think our lineup has a lot of potential for speed.  We are finding some good rhythm on the paddle, and the practice starts we did this afternoon felt powerful and connected.  My frustration with my own rowing comes from a small suggestion given by the coaches which had larger implications. I have a habit (not necessarily a bad one) of letting my outside hand drift a cm off the oarhandle at the catch, allowing for more length, and less torsion on my back. The coaches wanted me to change this today, and for some reason this small adjustment changed the mechanics of my stroke dramatically, and I felt really out of whack.  Anyway, I hope I am getting better.